Mulva Talking Vulva Sings Christmas Carols

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If a vulva could sing and comment on Christmas carols, what might she say? Find out here as Mulva the Talking Vulva sings and shares her views on some holiday favorites. Some are silly, some sexist, and some are just plain creepy!

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker, Sociologist, Sex Coach

ANTIVIEW: What I'm NOT as a Sex Expert

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I was recently interviewed by ANTIVIEW, a site that brings creativity and challenge back to journalism and interviewing. The questions were the opposite of what I'm used to, e.g., What am I not? How doesn't someone become a sex expert? I have included the first portion of the interview below, but please click on the link to go to the ANTIVIEW site to read the rest!

WHAT ARE YOU NOT?

I do not sleep with my clients or watch them have sex.

I am not a psychologist or a marriage and family therapist.

I do not have orgies on the weekends (although I’m not opposed to the idea!).

I’m not ungrounded or “woo-woo,” although I do take a holistic approach to my work.

I am not a man-hater, although I identify with feminism, and I do not take sides in my counseling work.

I do not make people feel bad about being sexual under their own terms and by their own definitions.

There are a lot of assumptions about my kind of work, so it’s fun to be able to articulate, off the bat, what I am not!

Read the rest of the article at ANTIVIEW.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sex Coach, Sexologist, Sex Expert, Sociologist

Auto Erotic

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Tips for getting down and dirty in your car, from the September issue of Pacific San Diego Magazine. :)

 ~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sociologist, Sex Therapist, Sexuality Speaker, Sexologist

Sex at the Olympics

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Photo by Shaun Botterill/Getty ImagesI’ve been reading some accounts of the “depravity” in the Olympic Village at past Olympics. This summer’s 2012 Olympics expect to be no different. With 15 condoms reportedly distributed to each Olympian, the Olympic Committee has made safer sex easier.

Some folks wonder why there is so much partying, with such dedicated top athletes in London for one specific reason – to fulfill a life-long dream. I suspect the partying and sex takes the “class” out of these world-class athletes, in the eyes of some. But I think the more accurate question is, why NOT so much partying and sex? And for exactly the reasons stated above.

In general, these are young, beautiful, incredibly fit athletes from around the world. They are exceptionally dedicated and hard working. I presume they are treated with the respect and awe they deserve. Once their event is over, they are on vacation in another country, the immense pressure is off, and they don’t need to be responsible any longer. They can put the weight of their countries down for a moment. And either they are elated because they have fulfilled their dreams, or they are reeling from disappointment because they have not.

This all sounds like the perfect recipe for a lot of celebration, connection, enjoyment, or escape. For most, this is a once in a lifetime experience. And especially for youth, drinking and sexing and feeling immortal are all a part of this wild and unforgettable experience. They may be role models, but fundamentally they are humans. And besides, who wouldn’t want to be able to say they slept with Michael Phelps?!

(This essay was originally written for Pacific San Diego Magazine's Love & Sex Blog.)

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sex Therapist, Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker

The Time I Had Phone Sex & Didn't Know It

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Photo from: http://blog.catermydate.com/2012/01/is-phone-sex-considered-cheating/I have a pretty cool job. People talk to me about their sex lives. The topics and discussions never cease to fascinate me because sex is complex and just so damn interesting. I really enjoy what I do, and I’m pleased and proud to be able to create a safe, nonjudgmental space around uncomfortable and socially taboo topics.

However, sometimes my work is challenging in unexpected ways, like when I get weird phone calls. I take all phone calls seriously and professionally, even if the person sounds odd or particularly nervous. Lots of people are nervous the first time they contact me, so I try not to use that as an indicator that it might be one of those phone calls.

I was helping my friend Josh with some deep cleaning at his house on a Saturday afternoon when I received a phone call from a restricted number. I rarely answer restricted calls, but was happy for an excuse to stop scrubbing. The call was from a gentleman asking about my phone counseling services (this was before I was doing long distance sessions through Skype).

Through a heavy accent, he asked for a sample of my approach to sexual topics, and I acquiesced. He wanted advice on how to bring more sexual pleasure to women, and somehow it morphed into asking how to stimulate his own nipples during sex. “Use your own hands?” I suggested, confused. Our discussion continued for quite some time, as I struggled to understand what he was asking of me. Josh poked his head around the corner and with a raise of his eyebrows inquired if I was all right. I nodded vigorously – I had this under control. I ended up suggesting that the gentleman try rubbing up against a pillow or the edge of his sofa or bed. Several times he asked, “Now? Are you saying I should do that now?” By the third time, I realized he was also breathing heavily. I promptly hung up.

Josh popped his head around the corner again. “How’d you enjoy that phone sex?” he laughed. “I didn’t know!” I cried. “That SOB was jerking off while I was trying to be a professional. I wasn’t even getting paid for it!” As if that hadn’t been enough, the gentleman actually called back and left a message, inquiring more about my services. Perhaps my unintentional phone sex skills were better than I thought.

Despite my discomfort and the unexpected challenges of working in the sex field, I appreciate the variety and complexity. I think it all comes down to respect. I have immense respect for my clients who choose to face their sexual or relationship concerns head-on. But a man yanking his wank under the guise of professional inquiry? Not so much.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sex Therapist, Marriage Counselor, Sexologist, College Sexual Health Speaker